Spammers say the darnedest things! (3)

(Scroll down to find Spammers say the darnedest things! 1 & 2.)

I had really hoped my last 2 posts on this would motivate spammers to clean up their act.  Huh!  Dream on, Bruce!  These are (again, more) spammer-ad headlines that I’ve received from 11/22 to today.  My comments are in italics below each one.  Please know that I did NOT edit them in any way.  I just copied-and-pasted them, as is.

Enjoy!

I’m Giving Away Free Dollars (11/22/12)
   While I DO recognize that inflation and devaluation has reduced the real value of our dollar to a few pennies, the fact remains that they still have SOME value.  They’re not free.  So, what you’re really doing is “Giving Away Dollars, Free”. (Monopoly money contains free dollars!)

clixscence (11/22/12)
   Let’s guess!  The sense of clicks? The science of clicks? The smell of clicks?  The click scene??

I found the EASY Button! Want one?  (11/22/12)
   Ummm, no, but could you put one on that girl, right over there??

Million Doller Challange  (11/23/12)
   I think this is their way of getting out of paying!  They aren’t dollars and there’s no challenge!

MASSIVE ADVERTISING FOR OVER 1O YEARS  (11/23/12)
   Here’s another “honest” spammer who uses an O instead of a 0 (zero)!

Amaziiiiiiing  (11/23/12)
   The proper way to say that is Amaaaaaaazing.

Please do not share this info  (11/24/12)
   There’s only, what? 10,000 people on you mailing list?  Yeah, I’ll be sure to keep it quiet!

This Is The NEW No1 Mailer!  (11/24/12)
   Finally!  A mailer for no one!

Delivery failure (2nd notifictation) (11/25/12)
   He might as well have gone ahead and used “notifiction”. (It was an ad.)

Work From No Home  (11/25/12)
   Is that being homeless? or working from work??

feloow me (11/27/12)
   I had to stop doing that when I became a Christian.

“link” Shortner  (11/27/12)
   At all related to William Shatner??

More Traffic Then You Can Spend!  (11/29/12)
   Well, if I have to wait for traffic, I’d better have a yard sale to raise spending cash!

Bruce, Would You Like A Battery or a Dam?  (12/1/12)
   Since I’m fresh out of rivers, I guess a battery will do.

Get you site seen  (12/2/12)
   So, when you ‘get me’, you’re gonna make sure everybody sees it?

Bruce Help Us Make It to the List!  (12/2/12)
   You do know Shindler’s dead, right?

Are You Still Waisting Your Time Clicking for Credits?  (12/2/12)
   Yup.  In fact, I’ve got to punch extra holes in my belt!

We Do Everything You Do NOTHING You EARN Money  (12/3/12)
   If you switch the words NOTHING and Money, we’ll understand what’s really goin’ on.

GET COINS & EARN MONEY BY REFERING USERS  (12/3/12)
   Of course, NOW that it’s being promoted, I don’t have any weed!

Two Myths Keeping You From Healthy Joints  (12/4/12)
   One would be ‘Beer is better than orange juice’. The other….

I have only about a few months to live and I want you to Distribute my funds fifty-eight million dollars $58,000,000(united states dollars) to charities  (12/8/12)
   And you chose me out of the World’s population because…?

Bruce Join Our TrafficWave Team & Get An Act  (12/9/12)
   Ooooh-Kaaay, but I can’t tapdance….

The Complete Solution [fname]  (12/9/12)
   Really?? [fword]

Be Apart of something Life Changing  (12/18/12)
   Thanks for the advice!

loose unwanted belly fat  (12/18/12)
   Unless it’s tight, who would want it??

Make $10 Daily  (12/18/12)
   Finally, a realistic spammer!

Normal people everywhere are cashing in BIGTIME!  (12/18/12)
   So, how do we abnormal people cash in??

Create Your Own Blog On A Fly  (12/20/12)
   That’s gonna be one small blog! (…and I hope it’s trained to stand still.)

Nothing to Loose  (12/23/12)
   Ya need either one more o, or one less.

You have won bonus prizes for viewing 1 websites! $0.0001 commissions  (12/23/12)
   If I view just one million more, I’ll have a hundred bucks … and It’ll only take 350 days!

Leaders ALERT!! World Pre-Launch is Just in Looks  (12/23/12)
   Then, I’m out.  Don’t have any.  I’m very plain!

Look Simple Easy Cheap  (1/3/13)
   You been peeking in my window??

My Wife Told Me Not To Do This…But I Did Anyway…  (1/3/13)
   Famous last words of the American male!

The Intarnational Special  (1/7/13)
   This one might prove sticky….

Doooo ?? you want to see the FUTUREEEE 2013 ?  (1/9/13)
   Notttt particularlyyyy.

‘Til next time!  (…watch this, just for fun!  http://tinyurl.com/c8m9547 )

Bruce
http://www.internet-grocer.com

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About foodstr2

[Real name] Bruce Hopkins [Current residence] Quinlan, Texas [Work history in chronological order] Grape Picker, Scullery Captain, Printer, Preacher, Restaurant Manager, Gas Station Attendant, Copier Service Technician, Satellite Systems Service Technician, Satellite Systems Service Manager, Customer Service Manager, Family Law Legal Forms Typist, Storable Foods Business Owner, Courier, Telephone Support Tech, Telephone Sales of UPSs. Wanna hire me?
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